happy 40th anniversary my wonderful

40th anniversary trip pictures. 

A trip of a lifetime. 

Time spent just enjoying each others company.

He saved my life.......

Being born a woman....

I was born into a family of 11 surviving children. 

We were taught to be respectful  and be quiet. I never remember being held and told I was loved. I was one among many needy.... 

When something traumatic happened, whether it was to me or someone else in the family,  

it was NOT talked about. 

I came to you today in this blog, 

To say, we must stop suppressing conversations about hard topics.

I was raped when I was sixteen, and had absolutely no one to talk to about it.

Not understanding what that did to my heart combined with no one to talk to began a long cycle of self loathing.

I felt like a dime store toy.

Cheap and tossed aside only to be picked up every so often and then tossed aside again. 

LISTEN TO ME A SECOND....

Every woman I know has some similar kind of trauma.

Now, as an adult,  left to figure out who we really are and to fight for ourselves to be authentic.

What I am about to tell you is how I began to be healed. 

Alone, just me and Jesus, I began searching His Word to find peace. Just enough peace to make it through another day....

Not peace for tomorrow,  just for that day.

I took my time reading passages I had in the past read through and not understood. 

Slowly......and I do mean Slowly, God became my confidant.

The One who always heard my cries and understood my pain.

He had been with me during all those traumatic moments. 

He is a personal  God. 

He doesn't mind listening to our whinning and complaining. 

HE is our Savior in every sense of the word.

When I say He saved my life.....

I mean HE saved my life and He can save yours.

~love jackie 

because of you....God

God has moved in my life in such a way that leaves little guessing to His will (that doesn't mean I didn't try do my own thing, or buck sometimes)!

I have no doubt He will do the same for anyone searching for it....

He doesn't lay it out as some grand plan,

No, one day at a time He urges you forward in a particular direction. 

Thank you God for caring enough to give  direction. 

Help me receive it with thanksgiving and count the many blessings you've shared with us. 

I love you Lord

Psalm 145:8-10

The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. The Lord is good to all, and his mercy is over all that he has made. All your works shall give thanks to you, O Lord, and all your saints shall bless you!