He saved my life.......

Being born a woman....

I was born into a family of 11 surviving children. 

We were taught to be respectful  and be quiet. I never remember being held and told I was loved. I was one among many needy.... 

When something traumatic happened, whether it was to me or someone else in the family,  

it was NOT talked about. 

I came to you today in this blog, 

To say, we must stop suppressing conversations about hard topics.

I was raped when I was sixteen, and had absolutely no one to talk to about it.

Not understanding what that did to my heart combined with no one to talk to began a long cycle of self loathing.

I felt like a dime store toy.

Cheap and tossed aside only to be picked up every so often and then tossed aside again. 

LISTEN TO ME A SECOND....

Every woman I know has some similar kind of trauma.

Now, as an adult,  left to figure out who we really are and to fight for ourselves to be authentic.

What I am about to tell you is how I began to be healed. 

Alone, just me and Jesus, I began searching His Word to find peace. Just enough peace to make it through another day....

Not peace for tomorrow,  just for that day.

I took my time reading passages I had in the past read through and not understood. 

Slowly......and I do mean Slowly, God became my confidant.

The One who always heard my cries and understood my pain.

He had been with me during all those traumatic moments. 

He is a personal  God. 

He doesn't mind listening to our whinning and complaining. 

HE is our Savior in every sense of the word.

When I say He saved my life.....

I mean HE saved my life and He can save yours.

~love jackie